Public Apology

I cursed Mr K's 's daugther, come to think about it, I'm really so lousy in controlling my emotion. Feel so Stupid, Childish, petty and pocessive. Termination of a BGR have many reasons and I like to think of 3rd party. This show that I dun trust her.

I dun want to edit my previous post about cursing mr K and his daughter. Because that's how I feel at that point of time. But after calming down and think about it. If I dun trust her, anybody can cause the conflict, so I shouldn't be targetting on anyone. Or I'd say, my jealousy made me target on any guys who try to get close to her.

Here I'd like to apologise to Mr K for being rude and ill manners discribing him. What I wrote is one sided story.But also is the true feeling of how I felt about him at time. BUT What's the true story? When did he tell ICE that he likes her? under what condition? What's her reply? Honestly I really got no idea. And because I assume things I making an ass out of ME...

I guess only Ice got the right to discribe about this inccident. whether she rejected him? avoiding him? or? For me, I believed that she will reject him and try to avoid him towards those unnecessary outing, phone call and sms.

I always over reacted in BGR and when I get provoked this caused unnecessary quarrel with her or even with my friends. What I trying to tell in the post I wrote last night was to let her know how cunning are those pple working for years.

She treated him as a FATHER? MENTOR? but he's playing stragery game with us. That's why I fall in the trap. I hope she can see her friends more clearly.

Really sorry for being so extremely pocessive and over protective all these years. I'm really sorry about it. Your 21st BD is but u r still very young and navie. Therefore pls take care of yourself. altought I'm not very mature as well, but if u got any problems and stress would like to talk to someone, can always count on me. I will never turn u down. I'll keep my promise to take care of you. Even I'm just a friend of yours.

Once again, Sorry for condemning others and hurt her feeling once again. Although I feel hurt too... But by writing such a blog, it reflect a lot on me. What kind of lousy character am I.

Still dare to claim im not a sole loser? ha ha ha ha. Opsss..

Suddenly become so sensible? Cause I calm myself down in the swimming pool whole evening and think thru it again and again. Our break up is really due to lost of feeling. For me is Quantity time and she is looking for quality time. I attemp to use marriage to tie her down even though I know she hate restain. I know she is a super faitful person and YET I keep getting jealous over her male frens and boss. No doubt I'm correct in the sense that, those guys and even her boss got so called bad intention...

But this BAD intention is for ME only. How can i be so sure that some of the guys are actually much better than me and make her more happy? Once I think of this, I really shiver. Wat a beast am I whenever I get jealous. I didn't get a chance to look into the mirror, but I guess should be scary. This clearly show that Im selifsh, petty and processive.

She can choose right? even got married she still can have freedom, right?

I dunno why after break up with her, I can think of so many DAO LI.... And suddenly these logics somehow can click with Ice's thinking...

Who to blame for this break up? No one else. is ME, only myself to be blamed. wasted the final chance she gave me early on and hurt her even more. Still trying to push the blame to her boss. If I didn't throw temper and think in a narrow minded way, Force her to get married in 5 years time. Perhaps there r still some hope left... Right now. Her feeling to me is gone.

I really feel shameful right now, how can i... how dare am I to put in my blogs saying that I LOVE her.

Thanks for all of my friends who are very concern about our relationship. Really glad that I've all the good friends around me.

Sorry for being so ungentleman and unfair for Ice and Mr K and all those male friends.
I've been telling my one sided story here and results in others may have bad impression for Ice, Mr K and others.

Need to apologise for those who left comments on my post regardness Mr K's behavior, due to my one sided story, you guys got misleaded by me. Coin got two sides, colour have white and black. even got grey zone. So I cannot see things from such a narrow minded way in future.

In order to move on. I need to correct my MCP, Jealousy, petty and most impt is the word POCESSIVE. Being over protective and pocessive really ruin the whole BGR.